The Tortoise and The Bear!

Follow us on our mostly frustrating adventures

Finally, some spaghetti carbonara. June 29, 2011

Filed under: Jeremy Post,New Projects! — Jeremy! @ 8:13 pm
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Penelope and I went to D’Carlo, out on the county line near Alexander the other night and I would have rather had canned macaroni and cheese. Penelope ate her food, but I took a bite of mine and just sent it back. My “carbonara” was a big pile of noodles with some sauce poured on┬átop of limp bacon and some sort of dairy. When challenged about it, he said “well that’s how we do it in my hometown of Sicily.” Thankfully, the “only way [he] could feel good about his customer service was to not charge me for it.” I have literally never sent a dish back at a restaurant before, at least not without giving them the opportunity to fix it.

 

The next night, we go to Olive Garden, having given up on the indie Italian scene. I am smart enough to ask at this point, and no, they do the same thing: pre-cooked sauce plopped on noodles. And the waitress had been programmed to say “pancetta bacon” every time she mentioned it, which I thought was kind of cute.

 

So tonight!! I feasted! Browned some pancetta in a pan, tossed in garlic and shallot, cooked pasta, stirred it all together with some grated Pecorino cheese and a couple of eggs. Looks like hell, tasted like heaven.

 

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Country music, and possibly music in general June 27, 2011

As anyone who has had even brief contact with me knows, I tend to go through music phases, and the most recent one has been country music. I think I just have a weakness for vocal harmony and bridges. And just to clarify, country music from before the mid/late 80’s or so is useless to me. I can’t appreciate the classics. I’m sorry, Loretta and Dolly, but most of your music is boring.

Anyway, it seems strange that I enjoy it so much. There’s almost nothing I identify with in them – I don’t have a wife or significant other to cheat on (and given my stance on monogamy…), have never owned a truck, don’t hunt or fish, I live in as close to an urban setting as one can manage in Arkansas, the concept of getting together and drinking in a field, possibly with a bonfire is foreign to me, and I find the religious views and conservatism espoused by country music absolutely ridiculous.

I think has to do with the universal appeal of optimism; it seems that regardless how depressing the lyrics, it usually ends on either a positive note, or at the very least, hopefulness. And the ones that are completely unrelateable for me, like having a tailgate party around a bonfire outside of town somewhere are at least fun. I can get into fun music.

Oh. speaking of fun music, [obligatory (clap!) Kidz Pop reference here].

 

Hay everyone! June 26, 2011

Filed under: Jeremy Post,New Projects! — Jeremy! @ 11:13 pm
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This is a quick test for a cool new thing that may or may not ever function correctly. Cross your fingers!

 

Hmm, I have a blog! June 23, 2011

Filed under: Jeremy Post,Old Projects — Jeremy! @ 10:40 pm
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I have decided to make a commitment to post on here regularly. Sometimes I have ideas that are just too big for Facebook, but I put them there anyway. I’m going to make it easier for myself to make posts, but I’m worried all the good stuff has been written about already.

Oh well. If you’re subscribed via RSS still, then here’s a worthless post for you to read! ­čśÇ

 

Summer plans? March 2, 2011

Do you live somewhere along this route?

Let me know! This is the trip I am proposing for myself this summer.

I mean, I still have no idea what I am doing this summer and as usual I am freaking out about that. But in theory, I want to make this trip.

What are YOU doing this summer? Please tell me. Inspire me.

 

You know, fuck Comcast. February 15, 2011

Also, fuck the cadaver they rode in on. I’ll apologize in advance, I am normally prone to less-than-flowery language, but the combination of not having Internet and composing a post from my auto-incorrect happy phone is grating on me. That’s why we have low-traffic blogs to vent!

Anyway, last week, I signed up for cable Internet through Comcast, to replace our total failure of something approaching “Internet” we previously had through AT&T. It was installed on Monday, and by Saturday had broken. Scheduled a service call for Monday.

Guy calls Monday to let us know he’s on his way; Penny and I are not home, but Cash is! No go, the accountholder (me) has to be there. Funny, I say, because I wasn’t there when if was installed. I later find out that he is just blowing placenta out his ass, or whatever the idiom is. I called today, to have it rescheduled for after 3:30, when I’ll be home.

They came hours early, when I wasn’t home, and without calling me. Luckily, Penny was home and they fixed it. For about 6 hours. Called, again, tonight and the lady said someone would be at my house Thursday between 2 and 5. I very firmly reminded her that I have now had as much downtime as I’ve had uptime, and that someone was just here, and they would be at my house tomorrow. And not between 2 and 3:30. She agreed.

We’ll see what happens tomorrow when they show up. And who knows, all two of y’all who read this might even get a REAL blog post out of me tomorrow when I have an actual physical keyboard under my beautiful nails. I still have to tell both of you about my Valentine’s adventure.

Sent from my frustrating iPhone

 

Edit/Update: So, the person who was supposed to come to my house today didn’t. More accurately, he was sitting in my parking lot when I got home from work, but didn’t know anything about my service call. Then he went to my neighbor’s house and left.

So, missed the 2-5 slot without a whisper, and I call Comcast back; the man tells me that the call is marked “completed”, and that he would have someone out within an hour. About 30 minutes, a woman calls (from a blocked number(?!)) saying that I requested a followup call. After relaying my story to her, she told me the case had been marked completed, and that was that. She told me that there was no chance of getting a technician out tonight; they had all gone home, and that there was nothing she could do. I asked her why she bothered calling me, she said because I requested it, and we parted ways.

SO, I of course call Comcast back. The man I spoke with this time was very good, and I didn’t have to resort to my cynical voice. You see, I always start out customer service interactions with a very pleasant, calm tone, and only change it if necessary. This man dug up the details, that there WAS someone at my house at some point (who didn’t call me, or interact with me in any way), and that the second service call had been canceled because the first technician determined there was a problem with the line and there wasn’t anything to be done until tomorrow (again, without a phone call). This meant that I spent several unproductive hours at home waiting for either a phone call from a technician or one to show up at my house. And ended the day without Internet.

 

But a bittersweet ending, I suppose. After a more full half-hour on the phone, he said there’d be someone out to check the line tomorrow, and ┬ásince they managed to fuck up not one, but two service calls today, he’d credit my account $20. And since I haven’t had working Internet in close to a week at this point, that he’d credit my first month’s service as well. I mean, it’s totally worth it for having spent (literally) hours on the phone with customer service at this point, right?

 

If you look down, you’ll see that my good buddy Mark is offering his services to me, rudimentary Internet research indicates that this is somehow for real, and Comcast has a team of social-media-scouring customer retention agents at their disposal. I wish Mark the best, and I do plan on sending him an email, but I don’t know what Comcast can do to fix this, other than laugh at me because I took off work early today to meet the technician, and then wasted an entire evening.

 

Our insane neighbors, Pt. 2 February 4, 2011

Look down two posts and read about our insane downstairs neighbors.

The DAY after she called us faggots, our pipes froze and flooded their house. If I believed in karma, I might blame this on that…

I confronted our neighbor about calling us faggots and she OF CORSE denied it. I mean, really, I don’t care if you call me a faggot. Well, that is kind of a lie, BUT AT LEAST BE ABLE TO CALL ME A FAGGOT TO MY FACE. Don’t do it when I am playing DDR, or walking down the street, or do it by yelling at my house. Stop me, look me in the face and call me a fag. What, are you worried that I am going to hit you? Please? Worst thing I will do is cut myself and spray you with my filthy faggot blood.

We talked to our landlords about the dogs, our new roomate and our neighbors and they are so fucking amazing. They thought it would be a good idea to print off Tom of Finland posters and hang them on our porch. Go ahead and google Tom of Finland, I will wait here for you to return.

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Would that not be amazing? Anyway, long story short, don’t fuck with us ever and our landlords are absolultly amazing.

It’s snowing right now, I wish I was dead. This is all.